The Diaper Pool: Revisited
Thu, July 9, 2009 
Last Friday we checked in to a tony new resort in Palos Verdes, California for the holiday weekend. Later that evening (after fueling up on fire water in the hot tub), we were poised to drunk-dive into the empty swimming pool when a young man in a monogrammed polo shirt appeared and informed us, in the soberest of tones, that the pool was closed for the rest of the day. Why? Well -- "There was an accident."We pictured a broken neck, spinal fluid on the pavement, shattered dreams; a fatal fall from the waterslide, blood on the water, vacation turned tragic.
But it turns out we had it all wrong.
You see, the accident actually occurred in a kid's pants. (In a kid's pants??) Well--in a kid's pants in the pool. (Were the pants, by chance, disposable?) You bet your ass they were!
We can't say we didn't see this coming. As The Daily Doo reported last January in The Diaper Pool: Doo Not, the practice of allowing incontinent infants to blaze a brown trail through the big-kid pool has blossomed -- like a mushroom cloud of osmotic diarrhea -- into a poopy pandemic. So please -- if someone you love is a plastic pant smasher, please don't place that person in a hotel swimming pool this summer. Despite what you might otherwise believe, your fellow guests probably don't appreciate spending $400 a night to backstroke through your kid's BM.
Reader Comments (2)
OMG - thats so funny
I say just throw some more chlorine at the problem and jump in! You think the ocean doesn't have shit in it? Look at whales! They must take craps the size of . . . [fill in the blank]