It keeps getting harder and harder for singles to identify themselves - and each other - in the wild. But now that an Australian entrepreneur has boldly ventured where Singelringen went two years ago, singles everywhere are shouting a new anthem: YIS ("Yes, I am Single")!!

Like so many other brilliant ideas, YIS is so simple that you might think someone had already invented it, fleshed out some ideas with friends over a bag of Funyons, and then abandoned it when they started sobering up (from the effects of, let's just say, marijuana. Or whippits). But of course you would be wrong; no one has gone through with something of this magnitude before. Until now.

Take a look at the lady with the camel toe and the gay gentleman on the left. See that little round thing they're wearing over their chest pectoralis muscles? That's YIS! And for just $22.95, you can own your own piece of shit button that lets everyone know you're as single as your judgment is bad.

Although there's no wrong way to wear a YIS - much as there's no right or wrong definition of 'chode' - the website does offer a few right ways to YIS on yourself. Like:

Put the badge on and take it off according to the situation - you may only want to wear it for ten minutes each day.**

~ Or ~

Why not try wearing the badge in a group situation at the local pub or during a hens and bucks night?

Ohhhhhhh, now I get it! At first I had trouble picturing the sort of event to which I might wear my YIS - but shit, if it's ok for a hens and bucks night, I know I'll get some use out of it 2-3 nights a week. At least.

If you would like more information, ask someone to stick your hand in a bowl of warm water while you're sleeping. The next morning, take your sheets and your favorite stuffed animal into the bathroom, place them in the toilet, and set them on fire as the sweet, sweet sounds of John Tesh fill your apartment. (You live alone, right?) That's your penance. And if you still want to wear a YIS afterwards, start taking self defense classes and click here.

** Especially since the chances of getting beaten up and/or stalked increase exponentially if you have one of these on your breast.

If you've already seen commercials for the Snuggie™, then you'll understand why anyone who hasn't heard of the Snuggie™ must be told about it immediately.

While the Snuggie™ is hardly as rare and obscure a find as the Singelringen™ (click here for more on that one), we believe it is important to recognize any company that can take a stupid product that has no right to succeed and sell it with a magically un-ironic commercial that made us choke from shouting so many "that's what she saids" in so short a span.

Blankets are OK but they can slip and slide, plus your hands are trapped inside. The Snuggie™ keeps you totally warm and gives you the freedom to use your hands. Work the remote, use your laptop or do some reading in total warmth and comfort!

Could there be anything we might say to improve upon this? Might we point out the obsession Snuggie™ seems to have with hands? The freedom to use your hands?! We weren't even aware that such freedoms were at risk. Might we detract from the Snuggie™ by further pointing out that bathrobes, coats, sweatshirts, blankets, and basically anything one could possibly conceive of using to cover one's body, would also give us the freedom to use our hands?!

Nope, our first instincts were right - we can't do it any better.

That's what she said.